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I’m having probably one of the best weeks of my life. Easily.
Five days ago.. I flew 700 miles to meet Master. My lover. My best friend. And it was… perfect. We spent the few days beforehand worried about how it would be, if it would be awkward, if we would even dare to kiss, if we would be shy. Who would’ve known that we never should’ve worried to begin with.
I grabbed my suitcase, wheeled it toward the door, and saw Him. And I just… smiled. He and our mutual friend (referred to as M) hugged me and we walked out of the airport and to the car. I smoked a cigarette before hopping into the backseat with him, where he literally pulled me into his arms and just held me. We cuddled for a long while, and I kissed his cheek plenty of times. We couldn’t keep our eyes off each other. It’s the happiest I remember being in… this entire year. After a while, he tilted my chin towards him and kissed my lips. The rest of the ride past that (the 2+ hours it was, since we kept getting lost) is a blur of kissing, cuddling, laughing, and just an all-over good time. We stopped somewhere to get dinner, came back to M’s apartment, exchanged gifts (I got him a few shirts and a zelda wallet, and he got me the adult novel J.K. Rowling penned!), and enjoyed each other’s company.
Eventually M and her boyfriend left to give us a little time alone. That was something. He pinned me to the couch and kissed me, hard. He groped me, he smacked me, and he fingered me until I came hard. Then it was his turn. I greedily took his cock down my throat and sucked. I love giving head, it’s one of my favorite things to do for my partners. We almost got interrupted/walked in on (that’s what we get for fucking around in the living room) so I ran to the bedroom and he soon joined me. He ate my pussy, he fingered me good, and made me cum more than I have in one session ever. We had a slight issue with actually fucking, but it was fine by me. We pulled clothes back on and cuddled and talked for a while, just about us and everything that was happening, and spent time kissing, and I eventually went down on him until he came down my throat.
I took him home at 2am (and got pulled over for not using a turn signal, my literal first night here!) and we texted until we both fell asleep. Friday we didn’t see each other at night, which gave M and I some time to bond and be alone. But I did visit him at his work, which was nice. His store sells a lot of things that I would enjoy. We kissed and held hands and talked and just enjoyed each other’s company.
Sorry for the tl;dr, but expect a journal after this one as well, chronicling Saturday and Sunday :)
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Journal Nine: Threesomes.
Ah threesomes - the joy of fucking more than one person at a time. Double the pleasure, double the attention, it’s just awesome. However, at least in my experience, it’s nothing like porn makes it out to be, but then again, is sex at all? Flawless editing makes it seem so, but trust me, porn stars make just as many mistakes and goofs as the rest of us.
I’ve personally participated in two threesomes, and I literally just realized that they were technically both with the same girl (well, she would’ve made the first a foursome if she had participated) so that’s pretty exciting haha. The first involved taking a guy’s (who I would soon date, though he is now my ex) virginity, and the second, Master shared me with my married friends.
For the first, I was invited over to a friend’s house with promises of drinking, getting high, and a cute boy. My two friends, S and C were there, with this really cute guy that I was semi into. We all started drinking pretty heavily, and it came out that the guy was a virgin. Tipsy as we were, we decided that this would just NOT do. So he got out a condom and proceeded to unroll the entire thing before he tried to put it on his cock… haha yeah he was a mess. Somewhere we found another one and we were ready to go. He laid back and C got on top of him to ride him… I don’t think she was having much fun haha she kept asking for her sippy cup of whiskey! But she rode him for a while as I suckled on her nipples and kissed her. Then S got out her vibrator and started moaning, and it was hella hot. He eventually ended up fucking me for what felt like forever (dang virgins) and that was the end of that. In the end, he legit tried to pay us $10 each for our ‘services’ so HAH… yeah that was wow.
For the second one, S and her husband D were involved. D, bless his heart, had never had sex with another woman other than his wife, so he was super excited when I agreed. We got back to the house, and she got the ball rolling by taking off her shirt and making out with him… which, of course, made me feel super duper awkward, so he pulled me in close and started kissing me. We each made out with each other for a while, and my top and bra were pulled off, before I suggested moving it to the bedroom, since the couch was super uncomfortable for three big people to lay on haha.
But of course, i’m all super shy, so when they moved to the bedroom and started taking clothes off, i ran away, which is pointless because i was already topless so what’s the point haha. So i was herded back into the room, at which point S removed my pants and panties and lead me to the bed. We made out a little bit more and they decided to focus their attention on me. He got on top of me and kissed his way down my body, kissing my neck and sucking my nipples before resting between my legs. And oh my god, I can’t even describe. He flicked his tongue across my clit wildly, making me arch my back minutes into it. I must have came at least 4 times before he stopped and let her suck my clit into her mouth. She worked my clit while he fingered my pussy, making me cum yet again. But alas, when it came to be his turn to get some action, he had some ‘technical issues’. I felt really bad, because in the end, I was the only one to actually get some action, but we’re all still good friends and we love each other, so who knows?
So suffice it to say, threesomes are awesome in their own right, especially when the right people are involved. Master and I have discussed threesomes, but since I’m so jealous when it comes to sharing, as of right now, I don’t think it’s possible. I’ve told Him that if He finds a Domme willing to participate, then I’m down for it. Maybe one day, I’ll be okay with the thought of a playtoy, of sharing His dominance with someone else who can appreciate it. But such is life, and with this road we’re on, there’s no telling where we’ll end up. :)
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Journal Eight: Edging
Edging is one of the most amazing things Master instructs me to do - to rub my aching clit or fuck my tight little pussy, and stop just on the brink of orgasm, ride it out, and keep playing. If I even think about cumming before He permits it, typically I wind up with “no orgasms for 4 days” or so.
But if I thought that was hard, I had no idea what was coming for me tonight. Tonight, Master was feeling particularly sadistic and merciless, so He decided to test me. He decided that I was to edge myself, but instead of begging to cum or asking Him what He would do to me if i were there, I was to hold a normal, everyday conversation with Him.
He had me edge myself for a few minutes before calling me and asking about my day, how work went, and what I had planned for the night. It took literally no time into the conversation for me to start moaning, and He chuckled and laughed His way through our convo. I was shaking, writhing, screaming, squealing, and everything in between, whimpering as hard as I could to keep from begging to cum.
When he gave in… holy shit. I came so hard, I had a multiple orgasm. It was beauty and bliss and absolutely everything I needed. We continued with our little phone sex convo over the next forty minutes, and it was… wow. I can’t even come up with an accurate description.
My only complaint? I hope I don’t ever have to do that again.
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Journal Seven: Anal Training
As I sit here and think, with a plug deep in my ass, about my journal.. it’s hard for me to sit around and write instead of playing. But my Master has assigned this journal entry to me, though he knows it’s hard for me to keep on task with something deep in my slutty little ass. But i shall try.
Recently I’ve embarked on the journey of anal training. That is, training my ass and my respective sphincters to relax enough to accommodate Master’s rather thick cock. I’ve purchased several plugs in order to work on this (though between work and a wonky sleep schedule, I admittedly haven’t been working on it like I need to) and I love them. I love slipping in a plug when I’m playing for Him, telling Him how I can’t wait to fit His big cock in my tight little fuckhole. I know He loves how hard having my ass stuffed makes me cum.
I wish I could put into words how much I want His cock in my ass. I’ve had successful anal a handful of times before, but my partner then wasn’t quite so well endowed. But with Master.. he teases me about it. He humiliates and degrades me, telling me He will use my ass how He sees fit, regardless of my feelings. And i fucking love it. It makes me so wet to hear Him talk about fucking me in the most taboo of places.
I will train my ass. I will take His cock deep in my little fuckhole. Fuck I need Him today.
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Journal Six: Punishments
I’m usually a very good kitten. I try to obey all of Master’s rules and expectations, and keep from disappointing Him, but i’m not perfect. Thus.. punishments. Just sitting here thinking about it is producing a dull ache between my legs, and a chill just went down my spine. I know being punished is all about the discipline and the learning experience, but I’d be lying if I said I didn’t do things on purpose at times to be punished. The entire concept isn’t new to me - after all, we’re taught as children that naughty ones are punished for their infractions, right? In fact, at times I look forward to it. I see it as yet another way He exercises His control over me, His property, and that gives me the contented feeling I’m constantly searching for. I also love to help Him come into His own as a Dom, and aide Him in perfecting His techniques.
The best part of being punished, for me, is the anticipation. Sometimes He will tell me what my punishment will be for a particular infraction, but mostly He makes me wait.. sometimes hours, sometimes days, sometimes close to a week, before He gives in and tells me what He expects from me. All the while, I grow wetter and more hysterical with anticipation.. and it all comes to a head, especially when He grants me my favorite punishment of all, as depicted above. I love being spanked, so much that it shouldn’t even be called a punishment anymore. I love feeling my ass start to sting as I follow His instructions perfectly, counting off each stroke for Him, and i love the cool of the bedsheets against my tender ass when I’m done. Mmm.
The worst part is easily disappointing Him. He doesn’t make it overtly obvious that I’ve truly disappointed Him, but my cheeks flush and I feel shame for disobeying Him. This is the reason why, unless I’m being feisty or playing around, I don’t disobey Him on purpose. I can’t stand the guilt of knowing that He is disappointed in me, or that He is irritated with me. Usually it’s in these moments that He delivers my least favorite punishment, and one of the only ones guaranteed to at least make me tear up. One of my favorite things ever is listening to Him cum. I love His moans, groans, grunts, gasps, and especially love to hear Him moan my name as He cums hard. When He uses this as a tool for punishment, I am either allowed to listen/watch but not play, not listen at all, or my least favorite of all - rub my pussy and moan for Him, but i am not allowed to cum with Him. That last one brings me to tears quite easily, because there’s nothing like being allowed to cum along with Him. Usually after He’s done, He asks if I’ve learned my lesson, to which I sniffle and reply with a meek ‘Yes Sir.’ He doesn’t use this often, but it’s the quickest way to make sure I think before acting.
I’m sure punishments vary between each dynamic, because really, every D/s relationship is different. We usually do what works for us, and for the time being it’s the two above and usually some form of orgasm/masturbation denial, if only because there’s 12 hours between us and that’s a long way to drive for some ass. Punishments can be delicious, and they can be cruel, or they can be a wonderfully perfect balance.
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Journal Five: Fucking vs. Making Love
It’s easy to just SAY that there’s a difference between fucking and making love. Everyone does. Everyone acknowledges that on some sort of level, there is some difference between the two acts, even though the actual action is the same. So what makes the difference?
In my opinion, the biggest difference is the emotions and mood upon entering this sort of intimacy. As a slave, it doesn’t usually matter what I’m into, but Master will often take into account my feelings and my mood when choosing whether to ravage me or to caress me, though sometimes He completely dismisses those feelings altogether, and I think that’s when I feel the most content. When He uses me for everything I’m worth and then some.
Rough sex appeals to people for a wide variety of reasons. Maybe to spice it up in the bedroom, or maybe, as with us, it’s more of a routine, it’s an everyday thing. When He wraps His hand around my neck and smirks down at me, i just know that day will end in me completely satisfied and content. However, i want to note that there is still some emotion involved in rough sex, especially for D/s couples. There has to be some level of trust and caring for it to work (along with some sort of devotion and adoration on the sub’s part). However, let’s face it, though most Doms are more than happy to take their sub at any given moment, sometimes it’s not necessarily to fuck them for all they’re worth. Sometimes Doms want to be gentle and loving too, and that’s where making love comes in.
Making love does still exist in the D/s world, although few people seem to talk about it because it is most often presented as a vanilla subject. My Master can still take me and make love to me at the same time. Rough but gentle. Hard but soft. Merciless, yet loving. It’s times like these where He will twist my nipple and kiss my forehead at the same time, sending tingles all through my body and bringing me higher and higher to that nirvana-esque state I’m forever seeking, yet am only able to find with Him.
Obviously I have shown a clear bias, but that’s because I am an emotional person. I do have sexual needs, don’t get me wrong, but my emotional needs far outweigh them. I enjoy both rough sex and making love, but more often than not, I’d probably pick making love (or that may just be my exhaustion talking haha), if only because I love how it makes me feel wanted and desired, though Master’s pretty good for that.
This summer can’t get here fast enough.
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Still not yet technically, but either way. Happy Birthday to me :)
I’m off to enjoy a rousing midnight conversation with Master ;) so with that said, goodnight followers, enjoy the queue!
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Hello to my followers :)
I know I’ve been severely lacking with quality posts in favor of just queuing up a bunch of stuff. Truth be told, I’ve worked every single day for the past two weeks, and I have an 8page research paper due Wednesday. So I’ve been veeeeery busy.
However! I will be posting some quality shizz soon, starting with a random picture of me, so keep a look out for that ;)
As always, thanks for following me :)
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Journal Four: Distance/Separation
I know usually my journal entries are about something BDSM or sex related, but I’m in a really “mushy” mood right now, and there’s nothing on my mind more than how badly i want to be wrapped up in His arms. Not even in a sexual sense.. I just want Him close. His arms around me, my head against His chest, just feeling warm and comfortable and secure. That is what i crave right now.
This isn’t my first long distance experience, so trust me, i know that all long distance relationships/flings/whatevers suck. But i’ve never experienced one with this much chemistry. It’s hard to describe our relationship, because our situation is hella complicated, but right now it’s easiest to say that we’re really good friends with a D/s situation going on. We have an insane amount of chemistry, spoken/unspoken feelings, and even more raw sexual tension. It’s almost like a tease, to be this way, to be so perfect “together” yet we’re so far apart.
Days like today, i miss Him. Though I’m pretty sure you can’t miss someone you’ve never actually met, that’s what it feels like. I spend the day incredibly sad and with a knot in my stomach, like He’s just left me. I can’t explain it, I just knew I had to write on it (though more than likely, it’s just my depression coming back around again) to get it out there, and to tell Him that i miss Him/wish He was here/etc.
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